Am I a feminist?

I have asked myself this question since my sophomore year of college. I took a Sociology of Gender class in which we discussed the issues facing men and women (but really mostly women) in today’s society. Quite honestly my teacher was a proclaimed feminist who I felt didn’t respect the opinion of others and turned me off completely to the whole idea of feminism. But she also made me think. Am I a feminist?

Feminism as defined by google (that’s a reliable source right?) is- the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

I guess I agree with that. Kind of. Political and economic equality. I can hop on board. I’m glad I can vote. I’m glad I can have a credit card in my own name. I’m glad I can go to school and have a job. I am grateful for many things that the feminist movement had accomplished.

But I don’t like the word equality all that much. Or better, I should say I don’t what the word equality has come to represent. I’m  sure a thousands feminists could read this and tell me all the ways I don’t understand what feminism really is and that’s fine (I’d be thrilled if 1000 people read this). Equality seems to mean that woman want to be “the same” as men. Men and women are NOT the same. Just like I am not the same as anyone else. Just as society encourages us to embrace our individual differences, I think it should encourage us to embrace our gender differences. These differences are real. They exist.

Sure I think women should be given equal pay for doing the same job as men. If they do it just as well. But I don’t think that a company or organization should feel trapped into hiring a female just so that they don’t get the backlash for discrimination.

I think men are more naturally inclined to be providers. Just as there are stresses that come with motherhood and carrying and nurturing a child there are stresses that come with providing for a family. Women find fulfillment in motherhood, do they not? Just as men find fulfillment in “bread-winning”. This is not to say that women don’t enjoy success in the workplace or that men don’t value being fathers. All I am saying is that stereotypes exist for a reason. We each have an important role to play, men, women and children alike. If we would stop fighting it and embrace it I believe we would find true joy and escape the double-standard our society seems trapped in.

 

So, am I a feminist? You tell me.